It's the not the Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition commentary track that you need, but it's the one that you deserve: Adam West Batman superfan Aaron Reynolds (@batlabels) and comic book omnivore Chris Cardinal (@chcardin) discuss plot holes that can be explained away by Bat-Mite, Superman's inability to decorate his apartment like a human being, Perry White's sitcom-boss obsession with Clark Kent's football article, how Batman applies his eyeliner so quickly, sweet guitar licks, and much, much more.

Because this movie is three hours long.

Canon, continuity and fan service: Aaron and Chris talk about Archie, Star Trek, Batman, Captain America and James Bond, and contrast how those franchises deal with their long histories and built-up back stories. Also in this episode: dozens of Spectre Easter Eggs, the exact price of a 1983 Panasonic Omnivision front-loading VHS VCR, Game of Thrones spoilers, and why Mr. Lodge continues to let Archie caddy for him even though it always ends in disaster.

Aaron and Chris take the Kobayashi Maru test. Discussion topics include enjoying Archie comics as an adult, stealing shopping carts, refitting a pair of Aquaman Converse, why Aaron doesn't trust Mark Waid, hidden zippers in Star Trek uniforms, Frank Miller's Dark Knight books, Captain America's big reveal, and John Milius screenplays that may or may not be satirical.